Sorry!

.

Glad It's Over!

My New Date

Ain't she classy?

This is why I dont got to English Football matches anymore

and it aint even dark out!

Do you want a Lime with that?

Men with Drinking Problems!

Girls with Drinking Problems!

Girls and Beer - a Great Pair!

Happy Labor Day!

Did you ever wonder where Labor Day came from?? It used to be the day that all the babies were born. That's right, but the hospitals got too full and told all the mothers to stop having sex just on New Years Day (that used to called "Here Comes Daddy" day).

Look Ma, No Hands!

I must of come-up with 30 different titles for this picture. Maybe you have a better one!

I am NOT an Alcoholic!

No drinking in the mourning, say priests

Downing pints of beer and telling blue jokes at funeral services will no longer be tolerated by Roman Catholic priests in Ireland.

In a move aimed at halting the growing trend towards "a la carte" funerals, mourners have been warned against placing photographs and football shirts on coffins. The worst examples of inappropriate behaviour during services that have been cited by priests included the drinking of cans of beer in memory of the deceased during one eulogy, and a display of women's underwear on a coffin on another occasion.

One eulogy was even delivered in the style of a best man's speech, complete with risque jokes. But now the National Centre for Liturgy, which looks after church rituals, has announced moves to curb such irreligious behaviour. Its spokesman, Father Patrick Jones, said the guidelines were intended to promote best practice rather than tell relatives how to grieve.

This year, pop songs were given the boot from weddings in County Kerry, in the south-west of Ireland. Celine Dion's My Heart Will Go On, from the film Titanic, and the song Angels by Robbie Williams had been popular requests.

One word for this �BORING!�

Drunken Episode A Repeat

PARMA, OH�Sunday's episode involving drunken house-party guest Philip Welz was a repeat, guests reported. "I couldn't bear to watch it again," Robert Joffe said. "Sure, some parts, like when Phil pees in front of everyone, or when he pretends to have sex with the pets, are sort of entertaining the second time around, but on the whole, it was pretty tough to sit through twice." Joffe left the party early in order to avoid the episode's final moments, when Welz pukes on himself and passes out.

Man Born To Party Dies Partying

DETROIT�Loading-dock worker Randy Scharf, 25, who often described himself as "born to party," died while partying, his aggrieved friends announced Monday. "Randy was always up for a good time," said friend Steven "Beevo" Bollinger, who threw the house party Saturday night that proved to be Scharf's last. "He was the only guy I know who could drink a quart and a half of rum and still be ready for a night of barhopping." Scharf, who fell to his death while scaling the wall above a sixth-floor balcony, is survived by his loving parents, Mark and Anne, and his brother, Tony "Barf" Scharf.

Russian dies after winning vodka-drinking contest

A vodka-drinking competition in a southern Russian town ended in tragedy with the winner dead and several runners-up in intensive care.

"The competition lasted 30, perhaps 40 minutes and the winner downed three half-litre bottles. He was taken home by taxi but died within 20 minutes," said Roman Popov, a prosecutor pursuing the case in the town of Volgodonsk. "Five contestants ended up in intensive care. Those not in hospital turned up the next day, ostensibly for another drink."

Mr Popov said the director of the shop organising this month's contest had been charged with manslaughter. He had offered 10 litres of vodka to the competitor drinking the most in the shortest time. Russians drink the equivalent of 15 litres of pure alcohol per head annually, one of the highest rates in the world. Some experts estimate one in seven Russians is an alcoholic.

no shit!

2DRUNK 2DRIVE

A man whose car has a "2DRUNK" number plate has admitted in a New Zealand court to drink driving.

Philip William Bain, 33, has faced Dunedin District Court charged with driving while over the limit on Saturday. Judge Stephen O'Driscoll said Bain's number plate meant he was "just asking" to be stopped by police.

He was convicted and fined $NZ600 ($A525), disqualified from driving for six months and ordered to pay court costs. It was his second drink-driving conviction